Saturday 6 March 2010

And then the string of beads snapped

For a long time now, say four years I have been wearing a string of beads. Before that I was wearing a similar string of beads for about five years. I quite liked wearing that string of beads which resembled a string of prayer beads used by the Buddhist monks. Since that fascination, I have been replacing the beads everytime it snapped. The beads had become synonymous with my personality.

Not many liked wearing those beads and therefore that was a value-addition to that string of beads. AND ToDaY the string of beads which was with me for long, snapped and the beads fell down Slloowly . . . one by one . . . rolling . . . frolicking on the folds of my clothes. For a long time I had worn those beads and as time passed by the beads started wearing me. When people commented that those beads looked good on me and gave a mystical quality to me, I was elated. The casual liking to wearing beads slowly started acquiring a different meaning. It became an extension of me. I started associating my image with the beads. Since not many wore it, it became my signature. The few days I would remove it, atleast one person would ask me about the 'notorious' beads of mine.

I had allowed the beads to define me a certain way. Or rather I imagined the beads on me to define me. And today when the beads snapped, I felt an identity melting and that I could not do anything about it. I started thinking how something as insignificant as a string of beads could overpower me into defining my self. Not long ago, I had written a post on emotionally attaching oneself to something. How true!

The beads that wore me had finally snapped this evening. I think I will not replace it this time.

Picture courtesy: Internet


  1. Oh dear, I can see your point but have to say I would be out the next day looking for the perfect strand of beads to replace them. Something that defines you in a different way. You have got a good thing going...don't lose it. It's you!
    Jeanne :)

  2. I think you are courageous, no matter what you decide...but "letting go", that would excite me. There are new, other things to think about, consider...this morning at an AA meeting on lady was discussing something similar (like the beads) and she said, "How important is it in Chicago?" (We are in Naples FL).

    And I thought, "Yesss, just how important AM I?"

    LOVED this post!

  3. I love my pearls when I want to feel important...I wear them....

    So here's hoping you buy another necklace and it makes you feel good.

    Dorothy from grammology

  4. Dear Susan,
    Good Morning!
    I used to wear all kinds of beads;but then I stopped wearing them.As you said,the special beads like Rudraksham gives us mental strength and protects us.This is a strong belief.
    Replace your broken string f beads with the enw one.It will enhance your confidence.Then I was wearing the muticoloured string that we get from Mata Amritanandamayi Temple offices.that is also broke.But I really used to feel very good wearing them.
    Happy Women's Day!Be The Proud Woman!

  5. hmmm... yes, I know about those favorite articles we get so attached to. I have a moonstone ring I wear all the time, and would be devastated if anything happened to it. but then, look at it this way: you lost part of your identity with the snapping of the beads, but now you have free space for something new (not necessarily beads).

  6. Oh Susan I am torn. You see I just bought a necklace of my own, it has a very small amethyst crystal on it and I like it. It is different and not many people walk around with one on. It isn't anything too strange or overpowering, but it gives a hint to my current mindset and personality and somehow reminds me of my own need and goal which is to keep a certain perspective on life.

    If I had, had it for years I might, as I am already very attached to it, might have let it become an extension of who I am. But then again, it is merely a necklace, and I am, who I am with or without it.

    Maybe it falling away left the real Susan in tact. Good luck on your decision!

    Peace :)

    Nicole (Cole)

  7. Oh.. bad that the string snapped.. I understand how we get emotionally attached to certain things.. for me there were many- rusted pencil box which I refused to replace, colourful stone beads of various shapes from a bracelet, magnets I found while playing as a kid. .. hmm.. at times we need to let go of the emotional comfort they provide us... people as well as things.

  8. Well, few people can turn such a simple event into an interesting story. You are one of them. Nice post, I say.

  9. Jeanne:

    Somethings define me but then aren't they transitory. That realisation prompted me not to replace my beads.

    Have a lovely Sunday Jeanne.


    The fiddleman! Courageous -- I don't think so. Just an impulsive decision when the beads snapped for the nth time. I would like to hear more of that AA story. Thanks for the kind words.

    Have a joyous day dear peep.

  10. Dorothy:

    Welcome to the meanderings. Thanks for taking the time to write your insight. Feel-good factors are but temporary Dorothy. I am looking at ME sans anything and want to still feel good.

    Enjoy your minutes for they are quite precious.


    Welcome and nice of you to leave your imprint. I see that you perfectly know about various beads. We in India know that how beads add a value to our self. But then it is all in the mind.

    A lovely women's day to you as well Anupama. Have a great Sunday.

  11. Khulud:

    See how these small objects define our sensibilities. The beads (rather the fondness for beads) were with me for a very long time. Yes I do have free space now and want it to be free without anything. let me see how long I can hold on to that!

    Hugs back to you dear Khulud. Have a great day.


    Don't be torn Cole. All this happens. Yes the real Susan. Liked the way you said 'real.'

    Peace and joy to you as well Nicole :)

  12. Sameera:

    What profound last two lines! Thanks for that insight on life dear Sameera. I have let go of it. Let me see for how long it stays put that way.


    Thanks for the nice words you have said. This post is a reflection within which is declared. I am quite overwhelmed by the different responses to this incident.

    Have an eventful and idle Sunday Vinay :)

  13. I can understand sentimental attachment and even attachments to an accessory for good luck... somehow we become dependent on those accessories we tend to wear often or constantly.. .
    I try not to wear something for too long or I would feel a sense of loss if I happened not to wear it or loose it.

  14. BM:

    You are quite right in what you have expressed dear BM. I am also trying to get rid of attachments like that. Thanks for coming by and expressing your thoughts.

    Joy always.

  15. Beautiful post with so much symbolism.

    I guess we do at times put so much significant to objects; either clothes, jewelry or even other trinkets, such as amulets. We let these define s at times, but it is most likely an ancient ritual, a primal tradition, believing in luck or good luck charm being tied to these.
    I used to have "good luck clothes" an I still to this day carry with me three stones that my sister gave me almost twenty years ago. To this day I believe they bring me luck.

    Have a lovely Sunday,

    PS: My verification word today:



  16. Oh Susan, sometimes we become attached to something in such a way that we lose sight of the original intention with which we took up our attachment to it. I know this, as I have had similar attachments. It becomes almost like an addiction, or a superstition, and it begins to define who we are, and to suggest what we should do. I say you probably made the right decision to not replace your broken string of beads. You will always have the option of replacing them, but the options for defining who we truly are, without accessories, are few and far between. Interesting post... I would never imagine! You're so good like that, dear Susan!!!


  17. Interesting post!

    I used to believe, still do, in the powers of gems. However , I've stopped wearing jewelery of any kind including pendants and necklaces with gems. Instead I keep individual gems in a bowl on my working desk, look at them, touch them, admire their beauty and believe I could absorb some of their spiritual qualities. Sounds Weird Maybe.

  18. We all need to learn to let go and experience freedom although it may not always be easy. A complete string of beads if held together, even if it only represents one memory ..whether painful or happy- breaking free from them may give us some new founf freedom but keeping them together may be necessary for most people as it may represent stability that puts one in a very safe and comfortable zone that is not easily done away with.

  19. An insightful post Susan...
    Attachments of any kind, especially with people are really bad, they hurt one's heart and i for that matter, learnt it the hard way and am yet to fully recover...
    have a lovely day
    take care

  20. Susan, you are truly wise. You've given me a lot to think about. I become very attached to things too, and I find myself being weighed down by it all, almost becoming something I never thought I'd become.

  21. Hey Sus,
    Sems like a million days since I talked to u.. will write to u, so much to tell u abt, entirely depends on my LQ (laziness quotient) :P

    This phase will too pass...I know little insignificant things we wear (initially) and how others associate us with it :)

    Know what, I had this habit (still have) of gathering my hair into a bun no not at the nape, a little higher everytime I'm doind some work at inside... even bespectacled ppl without their specs recognised me and would wave seeing my bun!


    Haaahaa..time for a change darling and signs, I say

    cya and hugs to u Sus


  22. Dear Zuzana:

    You have rightly mentioned that this is part of primal traditions but they don't get very attached unlike us. I think it all depends on the mind.

    Take care and joy always Zuzana.


    Very true. Hoe frail we are at times! I am glad that you have endorsed my decision. Thanks for your kind words. You always make me smile with pride by your comments :)

  23. DUTA:

    Thanks for being kind with your words. Your idea of keeping gems in a bowl sounds nice and novel. I liked that esp the part where you said that you 'touch' them.


    How long it has been! I am so glad that you are in the rounds again. Welcome darling. It has been quite dreary without your presence. I perfectly understand what you have said. Comfort zones and stability will be shaken some day dear Silver. Until then . . . holding on seems secure.

  24. Ruchi:

    Missed your presence here. With people it is quite normal but with things, it becomes a tad peculiar.
    Thanks for coming by dear Ruchi. You have a lovely remainder of the day!


    Not wise but a thinking individual who wanted to let go of certain things that seemed to confine her in a particular box. Attachment to things or humans have sadness as a lingering shadow which can never be seen until the object of attachment is lost.


    Dear dear Ashes, where have you been? Hope you had a lovely holiday. Bun!!! like a ammachi!! LOL. Time for a change, I suppose. A change for the better is always welcome.

    Love and hugs dear Ash :)

  25. na not the ammachi one, more like the style of Japanese women, Geisha? without those sticks... and not that much pain to pin it up...:)))

  26. A very interesting post. And I feel
    this tells a lot about human nature. We do become attached to
    things. Especially jewelry that
    we wear, and the item takes on an
    emotional value, which I don't feel
    is a negative thing. Sometimes it
    is time to move on, however the
    beads did have a positive benefit.

  27. Dear Cynthia:

    We get bound by all these different external embellishments. Its definitely time to move on when we realise that we have outgrown the emotional aspect.

    Have a lovely weekend Cyn.



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