Sunday 16 February 2014

Gagging on milk powder

Can someone actually gag on milk powder. Well, if it is someone like me who likes to eat milk powder and is quite greedy about stuffing more than the mouth can contain, then one is sure to gag. And, one can even be gagged by the muffler, I read! Products like baby food, milk powder and certain other milk based powders somehow tickle my taste-buds and when I consume them, I do so like a frenzied person who hasn't come upon food for days. It begins with the promise of a single teaspoon but ends up with atleast seven teaspoons and much gagging. The problem is not seven teaspoons but seven teaspoons in a single (small) mouth at the same time! Even now when I think of it, I am  metaphorically choking and wondering how I could have managed such act of gluttony. Come to think of it, I gag on many things - literally and figuratively.

Take Facebook for example. I sometimes tend to spend so many hours browsing through the idle treats that are available to me that at the end of the day I feel as if I have gorged unlimited Facebook bytes that I feel tired and spent without having moved a muscle. I am not complaining but I sure feel sullen about the time that has slyly passed without my knowledge.

Another gag is sleep. I gag on sleep that when I finally decide to get some work done, my sleep memories often prod me to sleep again. Sleep is blissful and restful but the thought of sleeping without having done what I ought to have done, gags me. I choke and blame my irregular cycles of planning/procrastination.

I gag on books! Yes, you read that right. Books are meant to read but they have their own time. If one reads when one is meant to be doing something else then the guilt gags you big time. For this, I have to shift the blame to the many Facebook book clubs which I am a part of. See, the cycle has come full circle by connecting everything to the Facebook gag!

I know that this post was an exaggeration of sorts but then everyone is gagging on something all the time - and some gags come disguised as seemingly constructive things like Books, blogging, music and the not-so-innocent milk powder!

So what are you gagging on today?

Thursday 13 February 2014

Breaking the illusion of romantic train journeys

Off late I have come to accept the fact that I find long train journeys boring and that I prefer to sleep rather than cozy up to a book. Well, a few years ago, even two years ago, I wouldn't have accepted the fact of boring train journeys but now I realise that I better burst my self-made bubble. I suppose even age has something to contribute in this aspect. There was a time I swore by train journeys. And, sometimes, even now, the appearing of a blue coloured train at a distance with its smoke and sound makes me nostalgic for leaving to some place and just the imagination of curling up with a book sends spasms of excitement through my senses. Alas! the thrill lasts only for a few minutes when the distant approach of a train creates a frenzied longing - after the train arrives at the station and stops - I feel a bit unsettled to leave the comfort zone of my home and take on a  journey.

But mind you, I still enjoy travelling to new places or perhaps I think I do. Sometimes I wonder whether I allow certain lies to fog my mind and knowingly I submit myself to these grand illusions. These lies are always so comforting. They allow us to cheat ourselves and in the process we are made fools by our own thoughts and emotions.

Coming back to train journeys, I wonder whether it is the length of time or perhaps the closed confines of an AC chair that bores me. Maybe long journeys are better with hoardes of relatives and cousins who chatter away to glory. No, I have also travelled with many people but still find myself longing for the journey to come to an end. And books! I do like them but I prefer sleeping to reading while in a train. The moment I open a book, my eyes feel heavy and my senses dulled. I think that my body is weary and I shall sleep a bit and then get back to reading but that seldom happens. I sleep like there's no tomorrow and the book/s remain untouched through the rest of the journey and I make a mental note to not carry any books the next time. But as you suspected, I forget the promise, carry books in the next journey and continue to sleep blissfully.

I have come to realise that we carry an image of our younger self's habits, likings and desires into our consecutive phase of life. I, atleast, think that my tastes in food, books and music will continue to remain the same as I advance in years but sadly that is not the case; probably that is the reason one tends to grow out of friends who were so very precious during our childhood. Sometimes even memories are so - one outgrows them and after a point, there seems to be no much use for those thoughts except that they defined us once upon a time. Awareness of ourselves through passing years is a vital aspect of our life and many a times, we like to lie to ourselves and live under the illusion of seemingly being the same person through the various stages of our lives.

So, what are your thoughts on living under an illusion?


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