The past few months just gushed by giving me more than a bowlful of memories. I am afraid that the bowl is slightly overflowing. It happens almost always - there are so many things happening with us or around us that we fail to stand/sit still and savour one moment. But I managed to savour many such moments. It is June and half a year has already whizzed past giving a glimpse of an international conference, some solid academic contacts, a discovery of beautiful places and monsoon in two of the states closest to me - Goa and Kerala (in that order).
Sometimes when beauty happens, there is an urgency to preserve the moment - I somehow want to scribble atleast few lines capturing the moments but I refrain more out of laziness than a stoic vow to etch the moment in the crevices of my mindscape. Alas! How many such moments will I strive to remember. I also realise that I remember only certain happenings; my sister tells me of a time when she was rather pale and sick but me, being me, don't even have an iota of remembrance of that episode. I loathed myself for the loss of that memory. Age is rapidly spreading its tentacles on my once-upon-a-time-sharp-memory. Then I remember that one is only as old as one thinks. Bullshit. One is forced to think of the age only when there are obvious symptoms, such as forgetfulness, in my case.
I guess I should just BE. Thoughts of memories, remembrance, nostalgia and so on and so forth should just happen, not forced out of the person's being. The blog is one such place where I strive to preserve memories but then, did I just say that one should live in the moment and no matter what I do to write what I remember, I am fabricating a story which is romantic and readable. What could be said in a few words, I drag to a post and then gloat over the written crap. Well, I am overfed with so many stories these days that my stories seem jaded to me. Quora, today, jolted me with a line that said that passive entertainment should be cut off from one's life if time and productivity should be improved. I guess that is precisely what I should be doing - limit my online reading of anything and everything ranging from the Stanford rapist to Trump to breast-feeding to yoga poses for a sexy back! I have become a carnivore of the highest order when it came to chewing and swallowing information.
I am tired.
I wish I write more.
I strive.
Sometimes when beauty happens, there is an urgency to preserve the moment - I somehow want to scribble atleast few lines capturing the moments but I refrain more out of laziness than a stoic vow to etch the moment in the crevices of my mindscape. Alas! How many such moments will I strive to remember. I also realise that I remember only certain happenings; my sister tells me of a time when she was rather pale and sick but me, being me, don't even have an iota of remembrance of that episode. I loathed myself for the loss of that memory. Age is rapidly spreading its tentacles on my once-upon-a-time-sharp-memory. Then I remember that one is only as old as one thinks. Bullshit. One is forced to think of the age only when there are obvious symptoms, such as forgetfulness, in my case.
I guess I should just BE. Thoughts of memories, remembrance, nostalgia and so on and so forth should just happen, not forced out of the person's being. The blog is one such place where I strive to preserve memories but then, did I just say that one should live in the moment and no matter what I do to write what I remember, I am fabricating a story which is romantic and readable. What could be said in a few words, I drag to a post and then gloat over the written crap. Well, I am overfed with so many stories these days that my stories seem jaded to me. Quora, today, jolted me with a line that said that passive entertainment should be cut off from one's life if time and productivity should be improved. I guess that is precisely what I should be doing - limit my online reading of anything and everything ranging from the Stanford rapist to Trump to breast-feeding to yoga poses for a sexy back! I have become a carnivore of the highest order when it came to chewing and swallowing information.
I am tired.
I wish I write more.
I strive.
I totally agree with the points raised in your post: time flies, memory gets slowly but steadily deteriorated with age, one should limit one's exposure to media if one wishes to improve one's life quality.
ReplyDeleteLuckily, we can prevent memory deterioration by staying mentally active.We can also become more selective about exposure to passive entertainment and online reading. 'If there's a will, there's a way' - as they say.
You are right, DUTA. One should keep oneself active. I have always admired your will and grit. Thanks for taking the time to stop by.
DeleteBest wishes,
Susan
writing was a vent out for me either. but somewhere in the due course I lost my pen and I let myself simply to be the part of this 'fret and fever.' I do agree with you, memories are inevitable which actually fill the ink in your pen. but I do feel I'm extricated from, feeling detached from all the happenings of my life and thus it forget to generate memories, neither does it store any. when I read your post, all of a sudden I felt an urge, a rush of words to be jolted down.
ReplyDeleteMy blog started out as a place to vent and relax. I guess as one evolves, we learn better. And, of course time matters. These days I just cannot bring myself to sit and write a post. There are a thousand idle activities.
DeleteGood to see you here, Rohini. How have you been?
Love,
Susan
Have you ever tried keeping a journal, Susan? Not a formal one, mind you, but one that you record those moments in short snippets to help you preserve a special memory. Just a thought!
ReplyDeleteThanks for visiting me today, my friend. I responded. :)
Blessings!
Oh Martha, I do have a journal and jot down things time to time. But sometimes, I just don't bring myself to do anything.
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by dear Martha. As always, a pleasure to see your comment.
Love!
I'm doing really good Ma'm. :-)
ReplyDeletewith love and regards ...
Wonderful to know Rohini. Again, thanks for coming by. I feel like an erstwhile blogger who is trying to sharpen the talons.
DeleteHave a fruitful Sunday.
I think that is the watchword - limit the online reading. We all tend to believe all that is served out "on line"
ReplyDeleteJoe, good to see you. Well, it's a task for me to keep myself off online reading. There is so much out there that I keep following links, reading, reading and then finally feel exhausted and guilty that so many other chores are left pending.
DeleteI strive to unlearn. I am trying.
Hope your Sunday has been rolling out well thus far.
Best,
Susan
I understand you so well. Every word. I often feel that so much consumption of information dulls my mind, it takes away my appreciation and focus from the beautiful present moment and dulls my feelings. Sometimes I think too how much time I have wasted since the advent of the internet on passive entertainment...how many silly things I have read, or written myself at times, how my focus has so easily shifted from LIVING to doing in order to post... I don't like it. :) I dream of learning to truly limit my time on social media and get back those feelings I used to have so easily. That savoring of the moment you describe. Thank you for this beautiful post, you've made me think.
ReplyDelete